Bread gained by deceit is sweet to a man, but afterward his mouth will be full of gravel. Proverbs 20:17

Verse reflections:  This verse really hit me today.  I am constantly deceiving myself into “allowing” extra foods I know I shouldn’t eat.  I deceive myself into thinking I “deserve” the food.  In reality, I “deserve” to be healthy and thin.  Telling myself I deserve the foods is a lie.  I will deceive myself by saying that I had a hard day so I “need” the foods that I know I should not have.  The truth is that I “need” to be thin and healthy so that I am not putting unhealthy pressure on my joints, ruining my immune system…  I deceive myself into thinking that “one more” will not hurt me.  The reality is that my “one mores” have added up to thousands of unhealthy deserts, carbs and processed foods.  I deceive myself into saying that “tomorrow” I will eat perfectly.  I have put off until tomorrow for decades as one day turns into a week turns into a month turns into a lifetime.  As Dr. Phil says, “Today is the only day that will change your life.”  A promise of tomorrow’s success only sabotages today.  I have deceived myself long enough.  Yes, the morsels of food taste sweet but just like this verse promises all the beautiful tastes disappear shortly and there is only remorse and broken promises that taste like gravel.  And then I chastise myself with renewed vigor as I realize that once again I have “failed”.  Today I am going to quit deceiving myself and I am going to savor the sweet tastes of foods made by God.

Prayer:  Father, remove the lies from my heart, my brain and my pantry.  There are no sweet tastes of breads, pastries and carbs that equal the tastes of all the amazing foods You have made.  Encourage me with the amazing smells, herbs and bites of Your foods.   You make the best foods we could ever eat.  I am convinced that I often crave foods just because they are bad for me.  What is wrong with that picture?  You would think I outgrew that at age 22 or so.  Protect me from the cravings, the deceit, the lies that I tell myself.  I have been “getting away with it” for so long that I just keep telling myself the same lies and over and over and I buy them every time.  Really?  God, I am sorry I am so thick skulled.  I need YOUR power to keep the gravel out of my mouth.  I am going to try to visualize my chocolate chip cookies tasting like gravel today.  Bless me as I work on my lies, my deceit.  It is interesting to me that I don’t lie to others, but I will lie to myself… over and over and over again.  Today it stops.  Thank You Father for verses like this one that open my eyes.